How can INTP get rid of the flattering personality? Retrieve yourself from MBTI personality test

Character/Personality personal growth 2323

Have you ever experienced such a moment: originally planned a whole day of arrangement, but because of someone else's request, he subconsciously said 'yes', and later regretted why he didn't refuse? As a typical INTP personality type (logical scholar type), you may think you are independent, rational, and do not compromise easily, but you frequently fall into the trap of 'pleasing others' at critical moments.

This article will conduct in-depth analysis of why INTP personality types have flattering behaviors, the impact of this habit on you, and how you should learn to express yourself without going against your heart, truly respect yourself and get rid of internal friction.

Why does INTP fall into a cycle of 'pleasing others'?

INTP-type personality is known for its rationality, logic, and spirit of exploration, but in interpersonal communication, it often shows the side of 'I don't care' and 'you have the final say'. This kind of flattery does not stem from the desire for recognition, but is often from an inherent calculation: 'It may be easier to do so.'

For example, when someone invites you to a party, you may not want to go in your heart. But your brain will quickly analyze various scenarios: if you refuse, will the other party ask for the reason? Do you have to explain more? Will it lead to embarrassment? By contrast, nodding and agreeing seems easier and less expensive. So you said 'OK'.

Three common inner driving forces of INTP:

Avoid social complexity: Instead of falling into repeated communication and emotional explanation, it is better to just make a decision.
Difficulties in expressing emotions: Although INTP is profound in emotions, it lacks the habit of converting it into language.
Fear of being paid attention to emotional aspects: Once the emotions are exposed, INTP will instinctively feel uncomfortable.

According to the survey data of 'PsycTest Quiz official website (psychtest.cn)' among MBTI personality test users, although only 47% of INTPs said they often put other people's needs before them, up to 74% of INTPs admitted that they have difficulty expressing their personal thoughts and needs. This also reveals a key fact:

The core of INTP's pleasing behavior is not to want to please others, but to lack the way and courage to express their true thoughts.

INTP-A and INTP-T: What kind of logic scholar are you?

In INTP, there is another important distinction: INTP-A (confident type) and INTP-T (turbulent type) . These two subtypes perform very differently in pleasing behavior:

51% of INTP-T tend to put other people’s needs first;
By comparison, only 32% of INTP-A have the same tendency.

More importantly, 66% of INTP-T admit that they often promise to do things they don’t want to disappoint others, while only 33% of INTP-A do.

This shows that self-doubt and insecurity are key factors that lead to flattering behavior. Due to lack of confidence in one's own judgment, INTP-T is easier to choose the 'default others' method to avoid internal consumption.

Three strategies: Make INTP no longer suppress its true self

Strategy 1: Before over-deduction in the brain, 'step on the brakes' in time

INTP's thinking is good at logical reasoning, but in social interaction, this ability often becomes a burden. When you start to make up for the consequences of rejection and conceive more than a dozen reasons, please:

Pause to think and take a deep breath;
Remind yourself: You are just guessing;
Remember: Those who truly care about you will not reject you because you express your truth;
Respond to your true feelings, not the conceivable consequences.

Learning to perceive the starting point of 'overthinking' is the first step to breaking the pleasing mode.

Strategy 2: Choose simple expression rather than silent consent

You may have a lot of thoughts in your mind, but you think it is 'too troublesome to speak out'. At this time, please don’t force yourself to explain the whole logic at once, but start with a simple sentence:

“I actually prefer…”
'I'm not feeling well now, I don't want to...'
'I need to think about this, I'm not sure.'
'I can't accept this arrangement now. Can I think about it again?'

You don't need to explain all the reasons - expressing feelings is a boundary in itself.

Strategy Three: Learn to live in peace with emotions, rather than suppress them

INTP often ignores the existence of emotions and feels that it is 'irrational enough'. But in reality, emotions are the prompter of inner needs.

When you feel tired, tired or impatient frequently, it may mean that you are already doing something against your will.

You can start training your emotional awareness like this:

Record emotional fluctuations in a day;
Pay attention to when it is most likely to feel 'struggle yourself';
Do not evaluate emotions, just identify and observe its appearance;
Start with 'I feel...' instead of 'I should...' to suppress it.

Recommended test: Do you have a tendency to please?

If you have repeatedly suppressed your real needs just to satisfy others, you might as well pass the following free psychological tests to understand more clearly whether you have a tendency to be flattering personality:

These tests can help you identify the deep causes of pleasing behavior and provide the first step of awareness for self-growth.

Want to know what kind of MBTI personality you have? Start here

Getting rid of a flattering personality does not mean becoming strong and indifferent, but being more courageous to face your true self and establish healthier interactive relationships. You can start with an easy rejection, a conversation that no longer says 'casual' and establish your own boundaries bit by bit.

If you don’t know your personality type yet, you might as well try our free MBTI personality test to test which type 16 personality type you have.

For a deeper understanding of the complex patterns of INTP personality in communication, interpersonal and emotional, we recommend you to read our MBTI Advanced Personality Profile . It provides a more systematic and personalized interpretation of INTP personality, suitable for you who have higher expectations for self-growth.