After completing the MBTI free personality test , many people will be curious:
'Why do I always keep not contacting friends for a long time?'
'I obviously want to maintain the relationship, but I always delay it until the embarrassing ending?'
Especially people with introverted personality types (such as INFP, ISFJ, INTJ, etc.) often hover between 'staying in touch' and 'staying distance'. It’s not that I don’t want to contact you, but every time I want to send a message, I will think of “I’ll talk about it tomorrow” and “Wait until I’m in better shape”… It ends up delaying for several months, or even years.
At this time, the friend who was originally close may have become a 'familiar stranger.'
If you are experiencing similar emotional patterns, this article will help you deeply understand the psychological mechanisms of introverted personality in social interaction and provide practical and practical advice. The content is based on MBTI personality theory (Myers-Briggs Type Indicator) and is originally published by PsycTest Quiz official website (psychtest.cn).
Keywords of this article: MBTI personality, introvert, how to stay in touch, personality test, 16 personality test, free MBTI test
Why are introverts more likely to lose contact? 'Social Disconnection' from the Perspective of MBTI
When many people search for 'How to make friends with introverted personality' and 'How to maintain relationships with introverted MBTI', they are actually looking for a way to maintain comfort and emotional support .
According to the theoretical division of the MBTI official free version , introverts (I) tend to recover energy from being alone, and they place more emphasis on deep links than surface socialization. therefore:
- Compared to frequent gatherings, introverts prefer to have a deep chat with one or two friends;
- They usually don’t like the instant interaction method of “suddenly calling”;
- Once the relationship “cools”, it will become more silent due to social anxiety or guilt.
Many INFP or ISFJ users mentioned in MBTI Advanced Personality Profile :
'I actually care about this friend very much, but the longer I delay, the less I dare to send a message, for fear of embarrassment and misunderstanding.'
This is exactly the phenomenon of 'social withdrawal': it is not that you don't want to maintain it, but that you have too much psychological burden.
Social media intensifies the phenomenon of 'familiar strangers'?
We thought we 'added WeChat/followed Weibo/browsed Moments', but we still kept in touch, but in fact:
- You are looking at the photos posted by the other person, but you never like or comment;
- You know where TA traveled, but there was no interaction at all;
- When you see the other party complaining, you just finished watching it silently...
Over time, 'I still follow him' becomes 'I am no longer a part of his life', and you just 'exist in social software'.
Especially for the INTP, INFP, INFJ and other types in MBTI, this non-active social interaction will aggravate inner discomfort:
'I wanted to say hello, but I was afraid that he would feel embarrassed... Then wait a little longer.'
'Seeing that his circle of friends is very lively, he probably won't be short of me as a friend...'
This kind of 'want to connect but afraid' emotion is the most common among the MBTI sixteen-type personality.
How to break through the psychological barrier of 'long-term contact'? Practical advice for introverted personality
1. Accepting 'contact cooling' is the norm, not a failure
Not all friends must contact once a week. The MBTI test tells us that each personality has a different degree of dependence on relationships. for example:
- Extraverted types such as ENFP and ESFJ are more likely to actively initiate interactions;
- Introverts such as INTJ and ISFP tend to 'if you don't look for me, I won't bother you.'
So don't feel guilty for 'we don't seem to be so familiar', it doesn't mean the relationship has to end.
2. Avoid 'embarrassing explanations' and send your sincere greetings directly
The key obstacle to 'not in touch for too long' is:
'How can I start so that I don't seem abrupt?'
Many introverts are used to making up some reasons (such as 'I remembered you today' or 'I suddenly thought of you when I saw a certain Weibo post', but honesty is the most touching person .
You can just say:
- 'I haven't contacted you for a long time. Recently, I saw your circle of friends remembering you. Are you doing well?'
- 'I have always wanted to contact you, but I was always interrupted by trivial matters, and now I finally decided not to delay it.'
Sincerity is often easier to get a response than reason.
Long-term strategy for introverted relationship maintenance: a small interaction is better than a big embarrassment
Many INFP and ISFJ personality types say: 'Every time I think it's a big deal, so I just don't contact you.'
But we can change this way of thinking.
Maintaining relationships does not necessarily depend on in-depth communication. A short comment or a forwarding can be a signal of 'staying connected'.
Let me give you a few suggestions:
- Like/comment the other party’s circle of friends or Weibo;
- When I saw the other party posting a troubled content, I said, 'I am a little worried about you when I see your state. Are you doing well recently?'
- Send some small items (emoticons, pictures, and interesting pictures) from time to time to establish an easy connection.
Treat interpersonal maintenance like exercise : you don’t have to do your best every time, but as long as you keep the frequency, you won’t let the relationship get cold.
Introverted personality is not good at socializing? You just need a way that works better for you
In PsycTest Quiz 's MBTI test system, more than 70% of INFP users reported:
'I'm not not trying to socialize, I just don't know how to express kindness under the premise of comfort.'
This is exactly what the MBTI personality test exists—helps you find ways to interact with others that suit you , rather than forcing yourself to imitate the social rhythm of an extroverted personality.
If you are not sure which MBTI type you belong to, it is recommended to use our official MBTI free test now to gain insight into your own:
- Character expression preference
- Emotional connection method
- Decision-making habits and interpersonal communication styles
At the same time, you can also pay to read MBTI's advanced personality profiles to obtain deeper self-cognition and social strategy advice.
Summary: Don't let 'familiar strangers' become regrets
For an introverted personality, maintaining a relationship is never easy. But as long as you recognize your own qualities and find the rhythm that suits you, everything will become natural:
- A brief message and a like are all signals of “I care about you”;
- Sincere greetings are far better than overexplanation;
- Introvert does not mean indifference; quietness can also express deep affection.
It’s better to contact the person you’ve been thinking about now—maybe, a warm relationship is waiting for you to rekindle.
👉 Want to know more about what kind of MBTI personality you have? Experience the MBTI free personality test portal now (PsycTest Quiz official)
📘 Want to get a more personalized interpretation? Click to check MBTI's advanced personality profile to start your in-depth psychological exploration journey!
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