How many real friends do you have? Friendship Psychology reveals the seven levels of friendship

Friendship has levels, and social interaction requires management. Discuss the seven levels of friendship through a psychological perspective, and understand how to build and maintain true friendships and make social relationships more stable and meaningful.


Have you ever had this experience: seeing a familiar avatar on social software but not remembering who he is? Or did you see someone posting a message in your Moments, but you found that you haven’t been in touch for a long time? Or if you encounter some difficulties in life but don’t know who to talk to?

All of these show that our social relationships are not all true friendships. So, what is true friendship? How should we cultivate and maintain friendship? Let’s discuss it from a psychological perspective!

There are seven levels of friendship

According to the research of psychologist Robin Dunbar, human social relationships can be divided into seven levels. Friends at different levels meet different social needs, and understanding these levels can help to sort out their social circles more clearly.

1. The closest friend: talk about everything, and feel like family members

These people may be close friends who grew up together, or confidants who accompanied you through ups and downs during their growth. They are the friends you trust, understand and love the most. You will think of them the first time no matter where you are.

2. Good friends: Intimate and supportive partners

This type of friend may be confidants he met in school and workplaces, have a deep understanding of each other, and is willing to provide support and advice when he is confused. They are important companions in your life and can provide help and emotional support at critical moments.

3. Close friends: mentors or good friends you can rely on

Although they are not as close as good friends, they still have a great influence in your life. Maybe he is a tutor, teacher, senior, or a confidant in a certain field. No matter you encounter problems, challenges or opportunities, you are willing to consult them for advice.

4. Friends in the social circle: a lot of companionship

You may meet because of your interests and hobbies and activities together, and like to have fun, gather and communicate together. They provide a sense of social belonging and companionship to make your life more colorful.

5. Friends at the event: Meet because of things, and have a happy cooperation

This type of friend is usually met by a specific project, task or activity, such as a gym partner, a member of a volunteer team, and a classmate in a training course. What they provide is cooperation and support in specific occasions.

6. ‘Convenient’ friends: social relationships based on interests

Perhaps it is parents in the same community who communicate for their children’s education; or it is partners in the workplace who establish contact for business transactions. Their existence is more based on mutual benefit than purely emotional connections.

7. Nodding: Only for superficial contacts

This type of person may be the neighbors you pass by every day, the distant relative you don’t meet often, or the friend who only interacts on social media. There is no in-depth communication between you, and you may not even remember each other’s names after many years.

From these seven levels, we can see that different social relationships can meet our different social needs. The furthest relationship can only give us some functional help, and starting from friends at the event, we can feel some companionship and belonging, and until the closest friends, we can get real emotions and support.

Each of us has complex social needs. If we think about it carefully, we may all be able to divide the people we know into these seven levels.

**You can try to think about what level your friends are at? **

How many friends do you need?

There is actually no standard answer to the question of ‘how many friends are appropriate’. Because everyone has different definitions and expectations for friendship, some people like to have many friends, while some people only need a few close friends. PsycTest (psychtest.cn) research shows that about half of people think that having 2 to 3 close friends is enough, but one-third think that having at least 4 to 6 close friends is enough to be satisfied.

But no matter how many friends we want, it’s important that we all need a certain level of social interaction. Especially when we are affected by the epidemic, we are more aware of how important it is to keep in touch with others to our mental health. Even saying hello to a nodding friend can make us feel that we are not alone.

How deep do you understand friendship? Come and test it!

The official website of PsycTest provides a variety of social tests to help you better understand your social patterns and relationships. To get a more intuitive understanding of your performance in social interaction, try the following psychological tests:

-Test whether you will betray your friends?
-Test your friendship hypocrisy index?

Friendship is the most precious wealth in life. Learn how to manage it correctly and make your social life better!

How to build and maintain friendship?

If we want to make our social relationships deeper and more stable, we need to pay attention to the following points:

1. Treat friends sincerely and be true to yourself. Trust and understand. Therefore, we must dare to express our true thoughts and feelings, and respect and accept the opinions and emotions of our friends. Close friends don’t need to lie or hide, they will use sincerity and frankness to help you recognize and improve yourself.

2. Put in time and energy and actively maintain relationships. We may often forget to say thanks to our closest friends, or we may ignore spending time with each other because we feel familiar with each other. In fact, friendship needs to be maintained and enhanced by actions, and should be expressed in ways that the other party can feel. You can try to think from the other person’s perspective about what gifts, activities, and topics they like, and then take the initiative to invite them to go out for fun, eat, and chat together.

3. Set reasonable expectations and boundaries Sometimes, we may have some unrealistic or unfair requirements for our friends, such as hoping that they can understand our minds or give up our own interests for us. Such expectations often lead to disappointment and conflict, so we must learn to communicate and compromise, and respect and accept the differences between friends. For example: You may feel that if a friend cares about you, you should call you on your birthday; if the other person does not do this, you may feel that he does not value you. But in fact, this friend may have delayed something else, or he thinks that sending a message is enough, or he doesn’t remember your birthday at all.

Friendship is one of the best gifts in life. We all want to have real friends and we all want to be true friends of others. Let us all work hard to learn how to better build and maintain friendships!

Link to this article: https://m.psyctest.cn/article/k7xqvldZ/

If the original article is reprinted, please indicate the author and the source in the form of this link.

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